Tag: Video games

I Keep Ruining Video Games

November 16, 2025

Like any God-fearing millennial male, I am hopelessly nostalgic about the Xbox 360 era. And I say “era” because I also enjoyed the Nintendo Wii, and what defined both consoles – in my shining eyes, anyhow – was local multiplayer. Wii Sports, Wii Sports Resort, three Halos, two Gears, Guitar Hero. One of the highlights in that pantheon was Resident Evil 5. I knew enough about the Resident Evil brand to know that 5 was a tonal shift, from survival-horror to horror-themed action, but it was a great game. “Come on! Come on!” “Chris!” “Sheva!” “I need a herb!” Endless fun, at least when you’re trying to farm enough gold to upgrade all the guns. Still, Resident Evil 5 could be accused of starting the ball rolling off a cliff, leading to the extremely unfun Resident Evil 6 – doesn’t even control right, feels like shit to play – and then a soft reboot with Resident Evil VII: Biohazard and its current heights with the parallel remake line. The action direction ultimately proved to be wrong, but how could you blame the Capcom execs in the mid-2000s? Japanese games were dead, said Lord Inafune. Why not cater to the Call of Duty bros? Well, the bros was I. Though I’ve never really played a Call of Duty game, I was the problem. … More I Keep Ruining Video Games

I Need a Herb

March 11, 2022

Tomorrow I’ll be booting up an old favorite, Resident Evil 5, to play with a friend over online co-op. This game has remained significant to me for two reasons: one, it was probably the last title from my golden age of video games, back when it was couch co-op. My buddy and I had done … More I Need a Herb

In Defense of Mass Effect Combat

November 27, 2021

One of the last games I was playing was the original Mass Effect, this time on PS3. I played the trilogy on the Xbox 360, and Mass Effect 2 multiple times, bought them all again on PS3 and played up to the quarian homeworld in Mass Effect 3, gave the original a shot on PC once, and started the original once more on PS3. I’d gotten to Noveria when I stopped, probably because other, more pressing things than a game I play constantly, had gotten in the way. And yet, as I write this, I’m paused on Noveria, about to speak with the shopkeeper jellyfish on the Mass Effect Legendary Edition for PS4. If I can get through these three in time, I’ll finally give Mass Effect: Andromeda another shot, though technically that should come between Mass Effect 2 and Mass Effect 3, right? Anyway, this was another characteristically boring introduction to our first segment, on the combat in Mass Effect. … More In Defense of Mass Effect Combat

Gears of Metroid

November 7, 2021

Gears of War 2 remains symbolic to me of my very first friendship. My buddy and I grew up together and played co-op games like Bomberman 64: The Second Attack up through the Halo series. He was particularly fond of Gears of War, and while I liked it well enough, I came to admire his fandom — this coming from a guy who was not and likely never would be a self-described “nerd.” I’ll always remember the date Gears of War 2 was released — 11/07/08 — though I had no idea it would be our last game. Nothing tragic happened, we simply parted ways shortly into high school. … More Gears of Metroid

The Fall of Reach is a Good Story Never Meant to Be Told

October 23, 2021

You might find YouTube video of “Halo 3 funny Elite dialogue,” including winners like, “One of us must die!” or “If you gaze at me much longer, we may as well exchange fluids,” and my favorite, the exasperated “We have few enough warriors as it is!” if you shoot an ally to death. If you haven’t played Halo, these lines are being growled by gravelly-voiced aliens, the “Elites.” One of the lines triggers when you, the protagonist Master Chief, melee an Elite ally. He replies, “Is this because of Reach?” The result of a special mode, this is not really “canonical” dialogue, though it’s impressive that even incidental writing was better than the real stuff in later sequels. … More The Fall of Reach is a Good Story Never Meant to Be Told

“We’ve Found Ourselves in a Village, a Resident Evil Village”

June 10, 2021

Resident Evil is a great stress test for my unified transmedia theory! That’s redundant, but I’d like to emphasize my concern here. In any given entry in the long-running zombie series, you’ll see inappropriate martial arts, superpowers, pretty boys, meme-making dialogue, boulder-punching, and a bestiary of such zoological scope it’s breathtaking. In that regard, it’s far closer to Pokémon than most movies of its ilk and their galdern, premature satisfaction with the simple zombo. So much to say, Resident Evil is weird. … More “We’ve Found Ourselves in a Village, a Resident Evil Village”