Who You Callin’ Stupid?

I posted a review for The Furious one week ago, and haven’t been able to stop thinking about it – not the movie but the review. And not just because it was a brilliant piece of film criticism, but because the apparent dichotomy between its near-perfect star rating and the more negative text of the review indeed represents a confusion I’m still processing. To go back, it wasn’t too long before my learning about The Furious and hearing the swell of excited reactions out of the festivals. This was the next Raid, and unlike the other Raid-likes over the years, it was coming to U.S. theaters. That had to mean something. Then the trailer releases online and, in addition to being phenomenal, is filled with enthusiastic, superlative sound bites. “One of the best action films of the decade” (in a decade which includes RRR, John Wick 4, and for me, Baby Assassins 3). I click around on Reddit and read similar opinions, though one person comments that the trailer pretty much gives everything away. “How could that be possible?” I huff. Well, one punch at a time, and I think this was a huge part of my reaction. … More Who You Callin’ Stupid?

No-Brainer | The Furious (2025) Review

We’ve got to talk about Joe Taslim and Kensuke Sonomura and Jeeja Yanin and all the With Eyes East favorites who’ve assembled for this action movie Super Bowl, but the story of The Furious might begin with a different name: Bill Kong. The last (and first) time producer Bill Kong came up on this site, it was in the comparison between live-action Blood: The Last Vampire – which he produced as a vehicle for Gianna Jun – and Kingdom: Ashin of the North, the homegrown Korean product which more successfully showed off Jun Ji-hyun to the world. If there’s one thing Bill Kong likes, it’s an American audience, as he also helped foster such crossover hits as Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon and the Disney live-action Mulan. He may have found a fellow traveler in director Kenji Tanigaki, the Japanese action coordinator who cut his teeth on Hong Kong productions like SPL, Flash Point, and Twilight of the Warriors: Walled In (not to mention odds and ends like Blade II and Takashi Yamazaki’s Always: Sunset on Third Street). Together, they’ve brought The Furious to the international market, starting with the Toronto International Film Festival, up to and including American screens the same day as the latest Spielberg release. That’s confidence. … More No-Brainer | The Furious (2025) Review

Kitana Wins

I’ve just gotten back from Mortal Kombat II, with a couple of hours to post this and prove that I saw it extra nerd early on Thursday rather than on Friday. I suppose I could show you the ticket, which I’d wanted to anyway because it was for 6:30, but then on the door, it said 6:45. And when I looked at Fandango today to see if anybody was gonna be sitting next to me, it also said 6:45, but there’s no way to prove that now. So, take my word that I thought to myself, “How can it be a 6:30 showing and a 6:45 showing at the same time?” Like a practiced modern moviegoer, I arrived at the theater at 6:30 sharp, budgeting enough time for all the pre-movie rituals, including waiting at the concession stand wherein the group in front of me appeared to be buying tickets? Growing surprisingly anxious, I finally made it to the premium-format theater and my seat and proceeded to sit there like a dope through, like, ten minutes of ads for insurance and cars. … More Kitana Wins

Feels Great! | Second Life (2024) Review

This is the rare case where my memory of a film, “edited” into snatches of images by whatever neurological sorcery, just about matches the film itself. When you hit play on Second Life, also known as Son of a Punch, you’d better not take a second to close an app on your phone or fiddle with a bag of – what do the kids like these days? – Fritos. It doesn’t even clear one minute, including studio logos, before something insane happens. A gang boss busts in on a police funeral and starts talking when all of a sudden he’s silenced forever by the flying kick of the widow, Lao Liang. Pregnant and now imprisoned, Liang establishes herself as top dog by defeating the treacherous Sister Hong in a fast, prop-heavy battle scored with music out of an old King Hu epic. The lighthearted tone and broad comedy are established here, as well as a relentless pace. The moment Hong is put down, she becomes a lifelong ally and friend, jumping to Liang’s aid when her water breaks only moments later. And in the next few moments, we jump ahead thirty years and meet Gui, an enforcer for gang boss Chang Meng who shoots up the ranks after protecting him from a dozen guys in a shirtless blaze. … More Feels Great! | Second Life (2024) Review

Rip and Tear | The Forbidden City (2025) Review

Whoa! You know, it wouldn’t take much for an Italian kung fu movie to be the best Italian kung fu movie, so why set the bar so high? I don’t think anybody else is coming. First of all, I’d be happy to address any reservations one might have, as I did, based on the title. Despite its somewhat foggy thematic resonance, The Forbidden City is “Chinese restaurant name” generic and may resurface unpleasant memories of The Forbidden Kingdom, the Jet Li versus Jackie Chan anticlimax which happened to be the Hollywood debut of Liu Yifei, who’d go on to play Disney’s Mulan in 2020, doubled by stuntwoman Yaxi Liu, the star of The Forbidden City. Capisce? As we find, “Forbidden City” is the name of a Chinese restaurant in the movie, but it could also refer to its primary setting of Rome, upon which Liu’s wayward character Xiao Mei eats, prays, and lays a heavy beating, and that’s only barely a joke. Fair warning (or invitation): the spice level here is “Korean.” We’re not talking CG blood and the weightlessness of mild American fare nor the horror-hewn sadism of Indonesia. It’s roughly comparable, I’d say, to The Man from Nowhere. Guys, do not fight in a Chinese kitchen, where there’s grills and frying oil and – oh, God – cheese graters. There’s a bone break so severe I yowled. Mei is hardcore, animated by rage and, to borrow a useful term, too angry to die. … More Rip and Tear | The Forbidden City (2025) Review

Envision Turbulence | The Fate of Lee Khan (1973) Review

A King Hu wuxia film is a precious thing, there being so few. I’d taken a circular route from the canonical works at the start of his career – Come Drink with Me, Dragon Inn, A Touch of Zen – straight to the Mountain duology of 1979, skipping over The Fate of Lee Khan and The Valiant Ones. Either way, I’m running out, though I was mightily defeated by Legend of the Mountain and left it unfinished. And so, there was something bittersweet about finally sitting down and watching The Fate of Lee Khan, or “The Turbulence at Yingchun Pavilion,” here at the beginning of the year, when the kung fu mood usually strikes. And ironically or not, the film is a pastiche, taking little bits from across the catalogue. It’s the tavern setting of Dragon Inn, the caper premise of Raining in the Mountain, and the cast of A Touch of Zen. Here, Hsu Feng plays a villainous Mongolian princess, sister to the titular antagonist, while the villain of A Touch of Zen, Han Ying-chieh, is a resistance member disguised as a drunk, and Roy Chiao, the Buddhist monk, is undercover as the henchman at Lee Khan’s right hand. By the way, is it technically yellowface for these Chinese actors to play Mongolians? You’re not fooling me, man, no matter how much additional facial hair. … More Envision Turbulence | The Fate of Lee Khan (1973) Review

Flexo! Shoot Flexo! | The One (2001) Review

Partway on the timeline between Demolition Man and Everything Everywhere All at Once, behold The One, a blend of science fiction and martial arts to suitably harebrained ends. Far from an expert on all things Jet Li, this first-time viewing was spurred on by its relatively recent coverage on The Greatest Movie Ever! Podcast, in which shameful secrets were revealed about past fondness for musical acts like Drowning Pool and Papa Roach (believe me, I understand). Indeed, this movie is from the year 2001 the way that people from Boston are from Boston, and as I’m currently reading/listening to two examples of popular literature from the mid-1980s, I’ve had occasion to reflect on how often not timeless movies and television are. Those books, Blood Meridian and Stephen King’s It, are both set in the past. By contrast, it’s the rare genre film from the 1980s that doesn’t feel Totally ‘80s! and thus subject to modern nostalgia-driven filmmaking. Will we have a cultural resurgence one day of movies like The One and XXX and The Scorpion King? No. … More Flexo! Shoot Flexo! | The One (2001) Review

IT’S HERE (again)

Donovan, my Baby Assassins partner-in-crime (the Miyauchi to my Tasaka, if you will, though maybe there’s a better duo to be), informed me a few days ago that the TV show, Baby Assassins: Everyday!, was eminently streamable on Hulu and HBO Max, and has been since October 16th. I was late. How could I not have known sooner? Where was the YouTube trailer? Where are the outlets meant to warn me? So, I’m here now to pass it along, realizing that perhaps I am one of those outlets. Not really, but seriously, what the hell happened? … More IT’S HERE (again)

K-Drama Report: Ms. Incognito (2025)

Oh, this show is delicious. Intrigue, secrets, betrayals; all the ingredients of a howling melodrama, but arranged neatly in an understated package. Ms. Incognito is a rare sort of genre mash-up: the cozy thriller? Even before we move to the idyllic small town, where a mountain range sits in each kitchen window like a painting, there’s such a comfortable atmosphere that pulls ever so gently inward. Even the old abrasive favorites like a deadbeat mom and flashbacks to an abusive father only pause the warm feelings. It’s the product of at least two things: the lush, cinematic style, and the story premise, which is just about my favorite thing in the world – a badass woman who’s pretending to not be a badass. She carries the aura of violence, an unheeded threat or even an invitation to instant karma. … More K-Drama Report: Ms. Incognito (2025)

Critical Lore Question

My understanding of Baby Assassins was that it was, if not “a big deal,” then at least “known.” Using this very website as a record, my earliest awareness of the series dates back to 2022 (see: “Hydra review”), one year after the first movie released, and even by then, I felt late to the party. Note, in that review, I reference the movie without disclaiming that I hadn’t seen it, which might lead readers to incorrectly assume I had. Garsh, I just can’t let myself get away with anything, can I? I’m such a humble guy! I’d learned about it from an entertainment website like Polygon (which it wasn’t, as their earliest coverage is 2024), in an enthusiastic review or discussion. I suppose this is my mistake, thinking that such writing is somehow indicative of the national (or international) pulse. No, outlets like that are pretty small-time, despite all the damage wreaked by unethical games journalism. Regardless, I then assumed that there were tons of people out in the world whom I could chat with about Baby Assassins, or at least pose this burning question: “Who’s older?” … More Critical Lore Question