Metroid Ravenous, Turok?, Youngji/Yura, Rescene
A grab bag of topics ahead of, ideally, this weekend’s review of Hope. Checking that out in about 12 hours, and I’m very excited. From what I hear, it was maybe less of a festival movie than a crowd-pleaser, like a throwback to ’90s American blockbusters — but with HoYeon! Anyway, probably the most eye-popping thing to happen recently was the official announcement of Metroid Ravenous. Previous coverage here noted the title’s leak out of a Brazilian government office, but it’s been confirmed, along with all it suggests about Samus’s monstrousness. The trailer, embedded above, showcases the same fast, aggressive bounty hunter from Dread, but maybe even faster and more aggressive this time, fighting “Space Ninjas,” according to the Nintendo guy, and doing badass things like grabbing the blade that’s just punctured her chest, and using her Metroid powers to suck the life force of her enemies. As she says, “It’s eat or be eaten.”
My God, I think I’m gonna cry. It’s so beautiful. I will never play this game, but watching the direction this series has taken is joy enough. I just got done yapping about the Major for the 2026 The Ghost in the Shell anime, where my favorite cyborg is at her most monstrous, but it’s so much more literal here. And on top of this exciting narrative foundation, the imagery in this trailer is phenomenal. As the kids say, it’s 100% aura farming. Ending it on a Kamen Rider Kick? Almost makes up for the utter lack of Kamen Rider Eins in my life. Come on, guys, that was back in March. The cover art, too, pictured in the YouTube thumbnail, is amazing, with Samus stepping on this guy’s arm. Crazy! The only thing I’m not super sold on yet is the look of the suit.
Samus has had a lot of great looks over the years. The Light Suit from Prime 2 is phenomenal, the one from Prime 4 was an instant classic, as pictured above. That dark red, purple combination is really nice, but the red and blue on the Ravenous edition is weird. You’re gonna have to tell me that the Samus is real and she is American. Here’s a better look:
I’ve seen some chatter online discussing how slim she looks, and in this case I’m willing to give the benefit of the doubt that they’re talking about bulky armor rather than a bubble butt. To me, it instantly read that she’s not wearing a lot of armor because she doesn’t need it. She’s attacking aliens with her hands. With that very Doom 2016 music, it’s clear that the developers heard all the comparisons to the Doom Slayer. They get it. Or they did, because the studio, MercurySteam, had massive layoffs earlier this year. That shit’s gotta come to a head, man. At some point, the business must be about game development rather than assets and acquisitions. As we saw with Halo: Campaign Evolved, you can’t make the same product with a different team. I swear, this is the only creative industry where talent is the last priority.
I do think that some of the blame falls on the audience, though. Early on, game studios tried to hide their talent, and it wasn’t until the ’90s that you started learning names like Sid Meiers, Johns Romero and Carmack, Warren Spector, Hideo Kojima, and later on, Cliff Bleszinski (for reasons good and bad). Video game players, let’s say, struggled to see things from the perspective of the video game makers, and often blamed them for problems that came from management (or mismanagement). After what I’d call a false start in the 2010s, when we confused serious games journalism for literary critique (the quixotic chase of “games as art”), we’re now getting the insider info, not only from reporting by Jason Schreier and /noclip but the veterans themselves, like the YouTube channels of Laura Fryer (a producer famously blamed for wanting to cut the chainsaw from Gears of War, which is not true), Tim Cain (creator of Fallout), and Raphaël Colantonio, who for a time was doing a playthrough of Dishonored with Harvey Smith and the other developers.
By the way, here’s a Ravenous reaction video by three male Samus cosplayers. I don’t understand what they’re saying (they’re Japanese), but it seems so wholesome. Do they qualify as drag queens?
Speaking of veterans, I’m also pretty excited for Turok: Origins. That’s another brand I’ve enjoyed mostly at a distance, but I know enough about it to understand that there’s no singular identity. It’s seen a number of creative directions over a decades-long history, as a comic and video game. The big change that the latest makes is an optional third-person POV, and I guess, a gameplay loop that feels more trendy than a straight-up FPS campaign like the N64 titles. What I see is that you get to play as a Native American woman who fights dinosaurs, so it could be a pinball machine for all I care. Most of the comments I’ve seen range from positive to cautiously optimistic, but for some reason the GameTrailers trailer is 100% negative:
Now, these people play more video games than I do, having only joined the current generation a few weeks ago (for Aliens: Fireteam Elite 2, what else), so they’re either seasoned or spoiled. But the note about the PS3 Turok is what gets me. Talk about rose-colored glasses. I didn’t necessarily dislike that game, but its ultra-generic space marine-ification of Turok was exactly the identity violation you’re now claiming of Origins, which at least looks as pulpy and gory as what the N64 games were going for, what with their big polygons and low draw distance.
I’ll be hooking this one up next spring, and it’s very possible that I don’t like it. But here’s something: Tim Willits is the lead developer, and if you love the Doom movie as much as I do, you know this name. He was one of the original id Software guys, and worked on titles like Quake, Quake II, Quake III Arena, and Quake 4. I– that’s a lot of Quake. Still, the point is, talent matters. We’ll see who has the last laugh, gamers.
“Food tastes better when you eat it in the bathroom.”
Switching gears a bit, Yura invited Youngji onto her channel, and I simply could not believe my bleary eyes that fateful morning. What a combination! I had no idea they were friends. It’s been a while since the last 9294* video — which was Christmas, I believe — but that makes sense, given Seulgi’s going from promoting Red Velvet to another subunit promotion, this time a Japanese album. I got to be honest, though, I was a little disappointed that this Yurayurahae video turned out to be an extended ad for a weird spa place. They go through tiny rooms taking psychological quizzes? That’s fine, but it made their interactions a bit affected. I would’ve rather the video been a one-one-one conversation, like they do in the second half. But in another universe, this video was ten minutes of that one-one-one, and I would’ve wished it was longer, with them doing literally anything together.
Yura makes such an interesting sunbae because she’s a real goof. I can see how Hyeri was the one adult in Girls’ Day, because Youngji — of all people — comes off as cooler and more mature here.
The latest from Rescene, or Woni’s channel anyway, is another great episode (English subtitles here). As you can see from the thumbnail, it’s a Liv and Minami, though everyone makes an appearance. Over the last few — my God — weeks, I guess, there’s been a running joke or detail about weight loss. I remember seeing the “Love Attack” video for the first time and feeling heartened that these girls weren’t sticks, but didn’t know how to properly express that idea. I assumed it was part of a generational shift, like when Bibi appeared in Hyoyeon’s video for “Second.” Those two were night and day. But part of the idea with Rescene was that they’re a small-market indie success, so they can write their own rules, right? Apparently not, as they’ve been dieting and exercising their little selves down in the two-year gap between making “Love Attack” and my seeing it. At some point, they talked about coming into that production chubbier than expected. But Christ, they’re kids. Kids aren’t chubby, they’re just kids!
Minami is a lot thinner now, evidently down about 44 pounds. That’s fucking insane, and not in the good, Samus-eating-aliens kind of way. The premise of this video is just to talk about that and investigate why, despite the rigorous workout regimen, she and Liv never seemed to lose weight. The answer might have something to do with Woni’s mysteriously disappearing candies and the after-workout convenience store raids, about which they built a culture of subterfuge. It’s really quite a fascinating peek behind the curtains. Other highlights include Zena not being included because she didn’t lose enough weight, May lamenting her possible replacement in the Lit and Mat duo, and Woni being the PE teacher. I love when they’re about to race and PD-nim gives them a false start, and Woni instinctively readies the whistle in response. Like, what was she gonna do, whistle at him?
As is pretty common with 안녕하세요원이입니다잘부탁드립니다 videos, it’s a mixture of funny and touching. The fact that Liv and Minami are already looking back on parts of their careers with wisdom at the age of 19 is crazy. I remember what I was doing at 19, and it was not jump rope at dawn or 30 burpees. The idol life is not for the faint of heart. By the way, Yura and Youngji actually briefly touch on Rescene at the end of that video, when they talk about feeling old. Yura debuted in 2010, and now she’s seeing idols born in 2010. Youngji is dreading that day, having debuted in 2014, but when asked about Rescene’s cover of “Pretty Girl,” she’s like, “Oh, I wasn’t around back then,” so it doesn’t count. True enough, “Pretty Girl” is decidedly from Kara’s cute era, which Youngji felt she missed out on. Now, because Rescene is so popular, she worries that people might think Kara is covering an original Rescene song.
Anyway, that was some stuff I needed to get off my chest. What I really need to do is get back to Flex X Cop II, but watching it at the same time as The Ghost in the Shell was tough, both being lighthearted police comedies. God, if only Jung Eun-chae blasted some terrorist’s head off. She did do a photo shoot for W Korea, though, and man, she’s so stunning. RIP me
With Eyes East 